CVD Group Blog

Billy The Bus Bounces Off the Door

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sat, 08 Nov 2008 18:06:00 +0000

Bill Gordon made a fatal mistake - not by failing to unlock the door before trying to open it at speed : but he did it within range of the security camera. Ruined his cool for a week.

Office Roasted CC

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 11:57:00 +0000

roots need done again then?

Driller ANT Go Kart Raceday

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 14:39:00 +0000

CVD, Corecut and Holemasters went go kart racing in aid of the Anthony Nolan Trust and to see who could go faster and raised over £3500 in the process.

CVD's highly tuned athletes.

Wee Kev with the race tuned twin turbo supercharged belly

He's skinny and he's shifting

Ross in an attractive blue prophylactic looking for Lisa

Faster than a speeding nuggetColder than a morning in Carstairs

The trophy cabinetWe Won! Kev Saunders, Wee Kev and Pink Ross

And it was an emotional re-union for Stuart and his Grandad Stan

Quarterback Fish & Chips V3 & CVD Contract Managers Night Out

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 13:22:00 +0000

Or should it have been Antelope & Chips? We went to Kublai Khans in Glasgow but unfortunately Craig got so smashed he forgot to take pictures. Fiona the Graduate got her eyes opened and Ali B & Jacky the intellectual solicitors had such a good time they want to go to the next one. They really should get out more, if that was possible.

There was some crocodile, an antelope of dubious origin and an awful lot of chilli sauce & some wine of much cheapness. Last thing I really remember is Gary landing an ice cube down Tracy's cleavage, & after the clatter he got is almost the last thing Gary remembers as well.

Mental note: don't feel you have to finish the second bottle.....

Mrs Carroll Goes Blond(er)

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 09:46:00 +0000

Caroline denies that she hit the bottle at the weekend and insists its nothing to do with finding a gray one...?

Beavis Gets The Snip

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 13:32:00 +0000

Tracy Lott the Marketing lady (formerly Miss Travel Agent 2002) has a cute Bichon Frise by the name of Beavis. There is a story butt it might be innapropriate to repeat it head on.

Beavis the cute one comes to work every day and happily sits under Tracy's desk, licking away at various parts of his anatomy, except when Roy the Accountant comes in - then he barks uncontrollably, must be the tie Roy?

Then one day Beavis went away happy, showing off his bits as normal:

And came back the next with less bits and a very sad expression:

Awww.....

The DrillerANT Whacky Races

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 29 Jun 2008 23:58:00 +0000

Scottish Diamond Drilling Companies are going head to head in a good natured Go Karting tournament to raise cash for the Anthony Nolan Trust.

On Saturday 6th September at Raceland in East Lothian teams from Clyde Valley Drilling, Corecut and Holemasters will compete in a friendly fun competitive day.

Speculation about Ben Hur V2 is entirely down to Owens' chin(s), Finlay's toga propensity and Stan's equine affinity.

The question is: who will field Penelope Pitstop, will she show her Compact Pussycat and will Dick Dastardly get cored by Rufus and Sawtooth in the Buckywagon, while Muttley gets an expansion joint from the Bear in the Whitburn Chugabug.

Sponsor your team here>>

CVD Off Road Day

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 12:54:00 +0000

Much fun and hilarity was had by Clyde Valley Drilling clients and staff at the 2008 Off Road Day at Glenfarg. These pictures from CVD's John Carswell thankfull only feature the one of him in the tasty green overtrousers, or as Billy said: DIY incontinence pants.

John does regularily walk about with one hand clasped to his ear. Either to make the most of his mobile phone output due to advancing years or, to deflect attention from his favourite other attribute. O'TheBN.

Emma turned down the opportunity to model for the green plastic brigade but not so Leigh. And unfortunately it does make it look quite larger.

Whatevah Emmah you cool person you.

Wing Commander Barrett was glimpsed just the once in his fetching pink polo shirt. Chauffeur driven in a half-track all day to preserve delicate skin and dispensed encouragement at all times: complimentary or worse.

Neon was a late arrival due to searching for a pair of gucci green plastic trousers. While Uncle Bob had a pressing ball to attend to.

Later on someone let the farmers wives out on quads. Leigh and Emma also went and stopped in the Perthshire wilderness to look for sweeties.

A full search party was raised and they were found safe and became well again after an application of mars bars and coke.

Quarterback's Fish & Chips 2

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 13:17:00 +0000

Quarterback went once again in to fryer at Grand Fish & Chips in Glasgow went the increasing shower of IQ 's rovers plus some other concrete related hingers on. Meeting outside for a few safety alcohols meant we could watch the sudents wandering past in togas.

Andrea as usual stuck her tongue out at everything that moved in an attempt to gain attention: especially from men in short togas. Wise Mrs Carroll decided to use 3 safety pins to prevent any unfortunate repeat of events previously and bursting out of the shadows. Shame... & Dave the coder looks smashed after just sniffing the beermat.

Ewan from CVD Fire is absolutely ecstatic at not having to sit next to Bob, not so the case with #1 Techie P Sands. Dave's fine: 2 beermats and a strange export = happy happy.

Big Al the brown wizard is confident pear cider is a good idea, Ross contemplates whether he can persuade Lisa not to put him in the boot on the way home, while Roy the accountant looks soooo innocent.

John the ginger wizard and Alan the wizard from Rosyth went into chimpanzee mode after Bob revealed all about the secret toga parties at a national construction company that cannot be named. Bob has promised photographic evidence next time.

Big Al looks fairly cidered-up and quite techie next to scrubbed up and glamourous Ms Tracy Lott: who was late but made up for it with a gallon of chardonnaay and a 12 bore straw: marketing people.

Ewan Ogilvie (Alfred Molina's stunt double) had his usual position at the end of the table quite far from Bob yet still within throwing distance for sharp objects and verbal barbs. Notice how the stained glass lends an air of reverence and class to his sincere quaffing and nosebagging.

John the ginger wizard had a shiny fish with potatoes and leaves: it was pronounced quite expired and tasted excellent. Tracy had an issue with the fishy eyes, she reckoned they were checking her out but that might have been the second gallon de chardonaay.

Andrea consumed vast quantities of italian (red) and by this time couldn't really care if Wee John arrived in tracky B's or just his edible thong. Mrs Carroll as normal after similar quantities of fish & alchohol checks the safety pins for security.

Sensual rubbing of the extremities is apparently quite comforting at times like that and while expressing milk: Andrea takes note for maybe next year.

And the final thoughts are left to chairman Barrett, or ZafodWiTwaHeeds as he is here pictured. One is cute, shiny and cherubic with a halo - the other evil twin is slightly less so.
Safety Beers!!!!

Roy Wins With Dodgy Tie

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sat, 05 Apr 2008 16:02:00 +0000

Roy Rennie the formidable CVD Group accountant won the second IQ Bad Taste Tie Day on Friday with this truly astounding piece of woven psychedelia. Must be a throwback to his youthful days in the time of free love and no sage line 50.

Coming at joint second were the dodgy code twins of Paul da New Guy and Dr John inda Departure Lounge. John's carried a health warning for epileptics and Paul insists his is actually 'a bit stoilysh noyw?'

The sterling efforts of a visiting Des from Cirrus were also appreciated, particularly as he didnt know it was Bad Taste Tie Day. Thanks to all who took part: next time Uncle Bob might also be persuaded to cross the line and be less than tasteful.

CVD Win SE Lanarkshire Training Award

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 17:17:00 +0000

CVD Drilling won the Training award category at the star spangled Scottish Enterprise Lanarkshire night in Motherwell Civic Centre, presented by Lorraine Kelly.

After receiving the trophy & since this was the last ever Lanarkshire SE awards, Mr Barrett got somewhat emotional, phoned his mum and struck a pose.

Also shortlisted were CVD Fire Protection for use of new technology to improve their business and Quarterback Systems for most enterprising new company. They didnt win but did get emotional.

Caroline & The Vat Attributes

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 11:25:00 +0000

Mrs Carroll the CVD Group Admin Manager is totally indespensible for all manner of reasons. Not least for her ability to keep everyone in check except Uncle Bob: but she does try.

Caroline is also famous for her other attributes, ensuring Quarterback's accounts are up to date and the Vat return completed.

Mrs C is however quickly using one to obcure the others here though. Next time...

The Empire Night Out at Primo

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 09 Dec 2007 19:31:00 +0000

Austin & The Foxies got it on at Primo in Milngavie Firiday night, for the CVD Drilling, Fire, Cirrus Recruitment and Quarterback 2007 Christmas doo.

The stories will be legion but the gist is we all got fed & watered royally, followed by roulette, blackjack and some more drink.

The steaming fairy visited once or twice and Cirrus Mo won the best girly costume and, Michael Carroll won the best scarface in a Dr Evil suit award.

Ewan sang, Uncle Bob dropped in and escaped before the carnage, Mrs Carroll nearly popped out and Ally was carried to the bus in a most elegant fashion. Full marks Mr McD.

More pics at www.cvdgoup.co.uk/events

CVD Fire Go For Gong

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sat, 01 Dec 2007 11:31:00 +0000

Thursday 29 November 2007 at the Victoria & Albert Museum in London, Ewan Ogilvie MD of CVD Fire Protection picked up the 'gong' for 'Impact of Technology on Your Business (less than 50 employees) at the UK Chamber of Commerce Awards 2007 . They beat 9 other excellent regional finallists to win this prestigious Microsoft sponsored award.

Well done that man and the company after winning the Scottish regional final in October 2007.

CVD Fire use some of Quarterback Systems' original IQ modules to enable scheduling, process management and cost control. However Ewan almost lost control when presenter Helene Hunt (Octopussy girl) had a fondle at his gong.

Ewan is pictured here with Craig Robertson of QB, after they realised going on the celebratory blatter was not advisable due to the early flight back up the road - whose idea was that...?

Quarterback Systems Bob Dolmio Night

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sat, 24 Nov 2007 22:14:00 +0000

Assorted staff & guests from Quarterback Systems had their inaugural Bob Dolmio Night at Glasgow's Grand Fish & Chips on Friday 23 Nov.

Excellent food, wine and 'the banter' followed a presentation of Bob Gray'isms which included the regular 'Aahh the Techies....', 'Communication, Communication, Communication' and of course 'Let's get the ball in the back of the net'.

Bob was unaware but took it well, and all the copies went with him as he escaped looking for a shredder. Owen (follicly challenged) played with fire and legged it early for a night in before jetting off again to a land far far away.
Yosof (an O not an E) avec le heid which shone so much that it blinded Charlotte (the bangles) who tipped his drink over and nearly landed him with 'the damp gussett issue'. Gadget Freak later claimed that his hair had not actually gone away but merely slipped down his chest: doubtless caused by too much Iphone useage.

Across the table from this pool of foaming EasternEuropean, Irish Brian from Big showed a remarkable ability to be Mother and prevent the issue reaching the redtops. Gary however showed his true colours as an accountant and requested a straw.

Ross (young man) had spiky hair again, which John The Warp Drive said has something to do with a film about Mary letting off steam and nervous energy. Pulsion Andy may have been the coolest person there, but he had spiky spiky hair as well: was it from the same source?

Ewan (Alfred Molina's stunt double) chose an excellent varietal wine and was less than grumpy despite sitting next to Bob. Mrs Carroll wore a big push up bra as threatened but hid her lights under a long fringe. Andrea organised their lift home by the Mystery Man in Trackie B's taxi service via ThaLaaww.
Why Bob Dolmio Night? Why not, it's nearly Christmas but.

Mrs McD noo

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 19:58:00 +0000

Allison in Admin married James an Orange Mastclimber on Saturday. Now Mr & Mrs McDonald are in Mauritious doing whatever newly married people do on the beach with factor 15. Dont forget to attend to the crinkly bits as well.

We wish them well and very best wishes for their future together.

CVD's own Cousin IT took the picture and had a 3 day hangover: but who chose the bedspread design? Mmmmmm.........

The Gordon Downie Issue

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 19:52:00 +0000

Bill Gordon & Gary Downie deny any sugestions that they are:

joined at the hip
buy clothing at the same shop
consult each morning to co-ordinate attire
are somehow related in a horrible way.

Inverness 10k

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 28 Oct 2007 19:46:00 +0000

The mountain that is Ewan Ogilvie did the Inverness 10k run in record time: we are in awe of the bulk that is EO moving at that pace.

Rumours of a serious curry and gallons of beer are again unfounded as the EO is tee-total, except for a small sherry at Hogmanay.

Or if Bob winds him up incessantly: a gallon of Mateus Rose' on the roof terrace.

The West Highland Way in a Day

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 28 Oct 2007 19:34:00 +0000

A group of intrepid runners took to the hills to raise funds for the Anthony Nolan Trust, running the West Higthland Way in a day, raising £2000 for the charity.

Ewan Ogilvie Director of CVD Fire Protection organised (and took part in) the event and said "It was a fantastic effor5t on a tough course and we are delighted everyone finished safely."

See pictures and the small sherry event>>

Ewan gets award from Dr John

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 12:39:00 +0000

Ewan Ogilvie MD of CVD Fire Protection picked up the award for 'Impact of Technology on Your Business' at the Scottish Chamber of Commerce Awards 2007.

The award was presented by Rt Hon Doctor John Reid. CVD Fire will now go forward to the UK finals in November.

If only they had co-ordinated the ties it would have been a Gordon Downie situation - international incident near miss: Coatbridge V Partick, scary, very scary....

Bear Mountain

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 21 Oct 2007 09:27:00 +0000

Owen has returned from the Mera Peak trail in the Himalayas, raising money for the Anthony Nolan Trust. He made it to the top, lost a toenail to frostbite and developed a fondness for yak. Cool hat.

-------------------

Hi All

I am happy to report that I am back from the Himalayas having summited Mera Peak with all my fingers and toes intact.

Many of the participants have altitude experience, including Everest, Kilimanjaro and we had a few members of the mountain rescue teams of Scotland present.

The trek to Mera Peak proved significantly more difficult than any of us had anticipated. Tough trekking and climbing in sometimes very, very, bad conditions took it’s toll on the party and only 6 out of the original 13 sponsored trekkers made the summit.

Luckily I was one of them. I have some photographs of the trek which I hope you find interesting - download the pdf from our website by clicking here.

Or see the edited highlights photos on this page. They include some shots of Katmandu, the trek, some locals and the effects of snow blindness and sunburn (even through factor 50) on my poor wee face. The scenery, when the weather allowed, was spectacular.

Many, many thanks to all of you who have sponsored me and for those who haven’t you can donate on www.justgiving.com/ob .

As a group the trekkers have raised just over £80,000 between us.

Thanks,

Owen Barrett

Always double check before taking core samples

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 21 Oct 2007 08:21:00 +0000

Cutting through an I beam is not really a good idea, in fact it's f@:()*&g stupid.
Yosof Ewing of www.smm7.com sent these in to Bob: maybe he got these from some other concrete corecutting company: who would that be....?

Primo Flambee

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 21 Oct 2007 08:08:00 +0000

Chef George loves cooking well done steaks (not) with Italian style at Primo Restaurant in Milngavie. He is however fantastic at cooking pasta and named his meatballs after someone in the Godfather.

Despite appearances George is family friendly and we let him out when it's not a full moon and someone's available to translate 'the Banter'. Oh the Banter....

noreply@blogger.com (Craig Robertson) — Sun, 21 Oct 2007 07:12:00 +0000

Could be the new Group Business Manager.....